Open marriage conflict?

Flirting Asked: Open marriage conflict?

My husband and I are in an open marriage. Our number one rule for married people that we date is that their spouse must be aware of the situation. No cheaters allowed. My husband met someone online. After chatting and finding that they had a GREAT connection he tells me the only problem is that her husband does not know, BUT he thinks that he can convince her to talk to him about seeing other people. I VERY RELUCTANTLY concede and let him meet her. Turned out that she played games with him and he does not want to see her in person again. HOWEVER, even though I want to contact to end, he insists that he does not want to burn bridges with her and WILL continue chatting with her online. I am right to be angry about this relationship continuing even though it will be online only?

Answers:

animalover101 Answered:
First problem, OPEN MARRIAGE. If you want to see more than one person, then why get married? This will never make sense to me. Anyways, on to your problem. If he said it was a GREAT connection… than thats just what it is and I dont think he will be ending it. period.



Starfish Answered:
Do you worry about emotional connections turning into affairs?If so, then I would nip this in the bud if you can.

Sounds like dangerous territory to me, and I think this woman that is behaving like this behind her husband's back is not to be trusted…

If one can't stick to the rules in an open marriage, it's not a good sign….



bridget Answered:
If you asked your husband to end contact
Then he should respect your decision to end contact

It seems to me the ONLY way open marriages have a shot in h*ll of working is complete honesty, communication and respect of your spouses feelings/opinions

Tell him how you feel and that his decision is jeopardizing the arrangement you have



NEAL JR Answered:
Tell your husband that if he can't follow the rules then you shouldn't be expected too either. Then put on somthing sexy and come see me!



Kimmy Answered:
Why on earth would you get "married" if you want to see OTHER ppl?? Makes no sense. The both of you are in FACT cheating….get over it



2012soc Answered:
Open marriages aren't marriages.



Debbie Answered:
I think it's laughable that you expect your husband to follow "rules" when the very nature of your marriage says you believe rules are to be broken when it suits you.Take it from someone who's been there, an "open" marriage becomes an open door your spouse will leave you through one day.



TiltMe2Day Answered:
Wow…didn't see that coming…

Um, yeah…he wants an "open" marriage all right…where he can openly cheat on you both with and without your consent.

This is why open marriages rarely survive.



Porsha Answered:
Why did you get married? your both weird along with the thousands of other stupid people that think OPEN marriage can work. I hope they continue to chat behind your back enventually hooking up and he likes her putty tat more than yours. That will teach you a lesson on OPEN MARRIAGE



Entrepreneur Answered:
This is probably not what you want to hear. If you would like to remain married, you will have to end the "open" part. If you continue on this path, you will not be "married" much longer.



Wayne Answered:
Lets see, you have no scruples about sharing your husband, but you respect someone Else's vows? What is this about? Dump him and get some real help



Andrea Thomasnaylor Answered:
Im doing my best NOT to judge…. but good lord! What happened to a union… this sets a bad example.
Anyway to ans.wer your question… You have no right to be mad. Once you give them an inch he will take a mile.
You are the wife and you must set your foot down…dont compromise more than you have…Good luck.



Tracy Answered:
You have every right to be mad. Who cares he isn't seeing her anymore he's still chatting w/her and that could only lead to something else. What's the deal, why does he like chatting so much to this lady? What is it about her that he wants to continue to chat w/her.



dipset Answered:
You are right. You both agreed to the rules.
Plus im must say that i support you and your open marriage. Im still young, but monogamy just doesnt sound appealing to me for the rest of my life. I think its kind of ridiculous and lays a large role in the high divorce rate. And please disregard (im sure you do) all the bible banger who tell you that your life choice is wrong.



Eric Answered:
Why be angry?You are in an open marriage!Neither one of you desire to remain faithful to one another in marriage.You play word games over what reality actually is: both of you are not prepared to settle down and commit to just one person.Your marriage is a joke.You have made your bed, now sleep in it and stop complaining.



Honey Answered:
I am literally sitting here and laughing at some of the other answers you've gotten. Apparently some folks don't know that the union THEY took may have nothing to do with the one YOU took. My husband and I wrote our own marriage vows and have yet to break any of them. What you vowed to your husband could have nothing to do with what another woman vowed to her husband, so I won't judge you and act like you got what was coming to you.

In your marriage, is all of your activity outside each other? Do you ever do things together? That might be your problem, if you don't. If you always do things outside of your husband and vice versa, accountability would probably fly out the window, and once it does, there is no way to prevent him or you from just up and doing things, which is an immediate way to break trust. Trust, honesty, and communication should be the bottom line in an open relationship or else you have nothing. If you have an issue with anyone for any reason, it should be enough for your husband to keep it moving and find someone else. The fact that he doesn't want to shows an emotional connection. That emotional connection suggests that your husband might not be right for this type of relationship, and that he would do things regardless of how you felt about it. Once he does that, your relationship is over. The key to a relationship like this.. better yet, a personal example. My husband and I are swingers so the tone of our relationship is alot like yours. But, if there was ever a woman that I had a problem with or he had a problem, that person would be excluded in what we do and we'd just find someone else. No arguments and no debates. The dynamic is that it's initially about us, allowing others in to play our game but WE are at the root of it all. If we couldn't mutually get something from this, we wouldn't do it. You're not getting anything from your husband's activity except discomfort. That should be enough to make him look elsewhere. If it doesn't, cut out the open activity.



LEYKIS 101 Answered:
NO you do NOT have the right!!! what part of OPEN RELATIONSHIP do you not understand??



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