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Why is his family ignoring me?

justamom Asked: Why is his family ignoring me?

I have been in an emotionally and mentallyabusive marriage for 5 years now. Last may I have pot a stop to it was ready to end the marriage. But due to my husbands, his family plea as well as our pastors i have decided to give him a last chance. Our pastor said that he will not be able to change without my help and that he believes my husband can change.

It has been few months. My husband goes to therapy and visits psychiatrists. The psychiatrist said about the abuse that is all about my husbands anxiety and depression and that we need couples therapy because we both need to work on our marriage. But I refuse to go to couples therapy. It feels wrong. M husband is taking antidepressants and has been acting much better. On the outside at least. he says he is much happier.

I am feeling better too because I didn't have this long ofa break from his abuse for years. But even now, I sense his manipulations. He keeps making me feel guilty for stuff. We are not able to talk openly about his behavior. I don't feel safe yet. I fear that al this peace and quite is jus an illusion.

Few days back he behaves as his old self. It was nothing that triggered him. I'am worried again. i fear that the therapy is not helping. I am worried that he is just playing me. We dated for one year and he was wonderful back then . But the day we got married he changed. I know he can hide his true face.

Other red flag is that his family is ignoring me. He told me that he has confessed to them but it hard to believe it. I used to have a good relationship with his dad. For all 5 years of my marriage I thought if i feel like i cant take it anymore I will go to his dad. he will hep me. His dad seems like such a religious person with strong morals.

I wrote his dad 2 letters. one in may and one 2 days ago. I never got any response. I didn't receive congratulations on my birthday. His family is ignoring me.

I am heart broken over that. i feel like i am doing the right thing, I am staying with their son even though it costs me (emotionally). I am helping him to get through therapy…And they will not even write me a word.

I am not surprised about his mom. Back in May my husband asked me to speak to hi parents on Skype. I told them about our marriage and the abuse. His mom said that if he doesn't beat me then its not that bad and that I am just exaggerating and that i don't have the right to punish her son by leaving and taking our daughter.

But I expected more from his dad. This family pray every night , they read Bible….but they will not help me. i asked them for help but received only silence.

What would you do? Given you probably wouldn't find yourselves in my situation to begin with but what would be our insight? I am just so confused. Why aren't his parents helping me?

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Posted by admin - October 2, 2011 at 10:00 am

Categories: Divorce Questions   Tags: , , ,

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