what is the best way to divorce your husband without hurting him?

Just Me Asked: what is the best way to divorce your husband without hurting him?

I think I would like to divorce my husband, he is such a great man, but I don't feel like we should be together anymore, I would like to be able to talk to him and have him see what I am saying, without there being any heartache.He is everything a woman could ask for, except, for some reason, I do not feel we are emotionally connected, we want different things, he is content with the life we live, and I am bored.I have talked to him about going out and doing stuff, a while ago, but the most He will do is go out to like walmart or the flea market with me. we have no friends because he says that friends are a waste of time, I have recently started talking to a female and have become friends with her and her husband and her kids and her brother and her husbands mother but I can not go over there anymore without him thinking that i am only there to get laid.I do consider myself to be pretty, but he thinks that every man who sees me wants to f*ck me…That makes him mad.But, I just I want us both to be happy and if I am not happy I am sure he is not either so what is the softest way to bring up the topic of divorce?

Answers:

Jim Answered:
>I don't think there is any way around hurting him.I agree, that you should move on if you cannot be happy in the relationship.I do understand your need to have friends and social relationships.He sounds insecure to me – and somewhat controlling of you.You do have the right to go where you please and to be with whom you choose to be regardless of what he wants.



The dude abides Answered:
wow . you've been brainwashed without a clue … He is controlling you , keeping you away from other people , not allowing you to have innocent friendships without feeling guilty , not socializing with others , isolating you………..
SERIOUSLY , see a therapist ,tell him/her what you've told us …..You need a divorce and there is no way to do it painlessly . I suspect he will make it very difficult for you to break the bond . He'll try with everything in him to make you feel guilty …………… Get help NOW ….



BB Wolf Answered:
I would suggest that your telling him that you aren't going to take 1/2 or everything he owns and that you will leave the marriage with what you came into it with would soften the blow.

I mean that is fair , it is you that has changed their mind and bailing ,,,,, right ?



RydeOn Answered:
you sound like a lot of couples when they have been married for a while. Things get boring and you get complacent and some times grown apart.They say marriage is work.You get out of it, what you put into it.You need to consider your part in it, he is not the entire issue.I would reconsider divorcing and working on improving it. After all, if he is a good man, you just don't give up that easily when you have a good one.You can regret it later once you see there aren't many good ones left. The next guy could be fun and stimulating to you, but maybe a cheater, or can't hold a job.If its just boredom and connection you want, work on it. Get him involved with trying to improve your relationship.Let him know that you are unhappy. Yes, it will be uncomfortable and awkward.But it is better then filling for divorce when you haven't tried everything or though "outside" the box.Go to couple counseling/communication. It can work wonders!I heard Dr. Phil say, "if you want a divorce, EARN your way out".How many times on this website have you seen people post "How do I get my ex back??"



gingerbread Answered:
Your thinking in the question is more then a bit woolly! If you divorce your husband for this, then where has the commitment gone that you made when you married him?
Also, you will certainly loose more then you stand to gain if you divorce this man, things like loneliness, worthlessness, and low self esteem.
There are some problems in your marriage, but not ones that can not be overcome one problem at a time.
Re your husband's reaction to other men seeing you when you are in public, one thing you can do is to ware clothes that are not too revealing, or go to a place where there are other attractive women, and watch your husband eye them all, than confront him with his double standards.



Drew Answered:
well like the old bandade just pull it off fast it will hurt but not as much if ya do it slow



Clicker777 Answered:
U sound a little selfish just using the word bored to describe your life. How can anyone be bored on this interesting planet?U say he is an ideal husband? Then why leave him? Have U any idea how economically worse things are going to get? Do U know how many other men have trouble showing their emotions? U should probably rethink leaving a sweet guy. The world is a jungle out there unless U have a great paying job and U just want to party all the time.



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